ASK ROSCOEDINEJAD

Dear Roscoedinejad,

Some of us are thinking that Islamo-Baptism needs more tenets, beliefs, rules etc.

Consider the following revelation....

Because Islamo-Baptism is more Christian and humane than pure Islam, which advocates the stoning of homosexuals, I think our policy should be the enslavement of homosexuals in hair-styling and interior decorating camps.

Enlightenedly yours,

Farouk Bin Ismail
Prophetoid of the Faith. (working on elevation to demi-angel)

Dear FBI,

Point taken. Clearly you have captured the essence of our emergent faith and the beneficence of our Merciful & Compassionate One, Jehovallah, PBJ. When Islamo-Baptist sharia is finally established, justice and compassion truly will be joined.

But now, allow me to pursue the question further: What, then, should be done with feminists, liberals and college professors?

Anyone -- especially true Islamo-Baptists -- may offer their thoughts here. The more the merrier.

What is especially heartening here, 'Rouk, is how the faith is spreading so quickly among quality individuals such as yourself. We are truly humbled. And we shall endeavor to devote more space here to an elaboration of aforesaid doctines & tenets.

So, watch this space.

Death to Colorado Springs! Allahu fubar!

-- Roscoedinejad