Monday, April 03, 2006

DAVID GREGORY: Eats with that mouth, too?

Some say it was Washington Post media reporter Howard Kurtz who dubbed NBC White House press reporter David "The Mouth" Gregory the "Sam Donaldson of the Bush years," thus helping to create a President-bashing monster. And further proving that some people really should just keep their opinions to themselves.

I remember Sam Donaldson—"Hold on, Mr. President!"—during those halcyon Reagan years, and David Gregory is no Sam Donaldson. In fact, I don't think Sam Donaldson is Sam Donaldson anymore, either. Didn't he, like, start wearing dresses and run away with the circus or something? Or else he just retired. One of those. But this blog digresses. . .

Scene: Iraq is going postal, North Korea and Iran are going nuclear, and the vice president is going hunting. So, what does David the Mouth dominate an entire White House Press conference with? Fudgate. [Insert whiney-voice sound file.} Why did it take so long for the White House press corps to be informed of Dick Cheney's hunting accident? An nauseam, and with much help from other argumentative reporters not wanting to be entirely upstaged by The Mouth.

Scene: U.S. forces mount a major offensive, Operation Swarmer, in southern Iraq that proves highly effective in routing insurgents and seizing major weapons caches. It was termed the most massive air assault since the beginning of the war in 2003. So, what does David the Mouth ask Bush's press secretary, Scott McClellan? Wasn’t the operation, in fact, just a ploy to prop up the president’s sagging poll numbers? As a friend of mine used to say, "Golly, do you eat with that mouth, too?" (Not that he ever said that to me, mind you.)

It was during the Fudgate affair that David the Mouth really got into it with McClellan, calling him a "jerk." To which McClellan said, "Calm down, Dave. Calm down." To which David the Mouth said, "I’ll calm down when I feel like calming down. You answer the question." Guess he told McClellan, huh?

Oh, and did I mention that David the Mouth is married to a lawyer? That's right--a journalist and a lawyer. Is that even legal? Sounds like another joke:

Q: What do you get if you cross a lawyer with a journalist?
A: A crook who can spell good.


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