ROSCOE’S Almost End of the Weak Review

Photo of the Weak. (Click on it for larger lettering.)

Tonya Harding in space?

On the wall in my office is a poster from a professional advertising trade association with a beaming black-and-white image of rogue skater Tonya Harding and the captioned question, “Have you done everything you could to win this year?” Trouble is, with each passing year it seems fewer and fewer folks actually recognize the image. So, bit by bit the joke is losing its edge. Not that we’re getting older or anything…

So, thank goodness for NASA astronaut Lisa Nowak, who has arisen to stand in the gap. We just might put that poster into reruns ourselves with the same inspiring slogan, but with a fresh, new face. Although some folks have likened Lisa’s forensic photo to the not-ready-for-prime-time pix of Nick Nolte and Glen Campbell at their besotted worst.

On the other hand, when Tonya’s done with her wrestling career (if she isn’t already), maybe she could look into the astronaut corps. Sounds like something right up her alley.

Not to be outdone

Then there was this fellow:

BRATTLEBORO, Vt. -- A 47-year-old data processing supervisor in the state comptroller's office this week denied charges that he was naked and masturbating inside a glass-enclosed ski lift car at a Vermont ski area.

Read the rest of this bizarre tale, if you really must, here.

Hip, hip, hooray!

Our Quote of the Weak is from Arthur Sulzberger, owner, chairman and publisher of The New Yawk Times:

"I really don't know whether we'll be printing the Times in five years, and you know what? I don't care either," he says. Read the rest.

Yeah, Artie probably figures the country will probably be down the tubes by then, what with all those treasonous national security leaks and all…